Dr. Seuss Goes to Indonesia!
Indonesia Here and There
From Indonesia, “Selamat Datang!”
As we say in Texas, it’s a “howdy thang!”
Dr. Seuss helped write this from here to there,
So if you come, you can prepare.
I do not like Green Eggs and Ham!
I do not like them, Siam-I-Am!
These guys are Muslim, Siam, you see,
That ham’s not pork, it’s mystery!
I would not eat it with a goat,
Not in a ‘copter, not on a boat,
I would not eat it with a bird,
(The birds have flu, that’s what I heard!)
I would not eat it here or there,
I would not eat it anywhere.
A tuk-tuk is a taxi here, you see,
A motorcycle with wheels of three.
If you have an opportunity to ride,
Do not, do not, get inside.
I would not, could not, ride one, you see,
I would not pay, nor go for free.
I would not ride from here to there,
I would not ride one anywhere.
Cars drive here on the left side of the street.
Unless it’s crowded or potholes they meet.
There’s not a move they do not know,
They invented contra-flow.
They swerve around from here to there,
They will drive most anywhere.
They have no gas stations in the land about,
So what do you do if your tuk-tuk runs out?
You stop by any old shack you see
With jars of petrol stacked by a tree.
You empty a few jars into your tank,
Pay your Rupiah, the rice farmer you thank.
The petrol jars are here and there,
In front of houses everywhere.
I went to the bank, I was very poor.
I exchanged a dollar, I had nothing more.
But they gave me in Rupiahs, you see,
Eight thousand, six hundred and twenty-three!
It is hard to figure out all those zeros on money,
Paying one hundred thousand for anything sounds funny.
But one hundred thousand Rupiahs to spend,
Is only about eleven dollars sixty cents in the end.
So when I use Rupiah and try to convert,
It clogs up my head and my brain starts to hurt.
Up to Singapore, I also flew,
The cleanest country I ever knew.
They do not have trash here or there,
They do not have trash anywhere.
The laws are strict, peace maintained
The minor offenders are often caned.
So you are safe while in your bed,
Or in a cab, or a bus instead,
You are safe to walk the street,
You are safe with all you meet.
I hope this finds you in a happy mood,
Remember humor is the mind’s best food!
I wish you well, and your family from far,
If you’re at work, at home or your car,
I wish you well here or there,
I wish you well everywhere.
-Keith-I-Am